We at The Family Foundation have been receiving some rather bizarre phone calls and emails today, like this one:
I just wanted to stop by and tell you guys that what you are doing is GREAT! I don't want to live in a world where Queers can be as happy as me. Why do they deserve to be as happy as a Christian? They don't even deserve basic human rights, RIGHT GUYS!!? In fact I don't think the Hunger Strike is going far enough. Have you guys considered mass suicide? I think that might help get the point across better. Just imagine all of the members of the Family Foundation drinking the magic cool-aid. Look at what it did for the popularity of Jim Jones! Anyway, just wanted to let you know that you are all a****** and I hope you starve to death. BYE! :)
Never mind the loving tolerance displayed, we’re used to that for our friends on the left. But for the life of us, we’ve been trying to figure out which of us on staff is going on a hunger strike.
After further investigation, we think we’ve discovered the problem. We recently announced our 40 Days of Prayer, Fasting and Repentance for Marriage. Apparently, that bastion of accurate reporting, the Huffington Post, did a story. Unfortunately, they made just a minor little error in their report (shocking, I know). They translated the word “fast” to “hunger strike.” Of course, almost immediately, the minions on the left blindly started repeating the error and now they are all in a tizzy out of hope that Christians across Virginia might die of hunger.
Our friends on the secular left I’m afraid have gotten their hopes up just a bit. I’m sorry to have to dampen their excitement over the impending death of followers of Christ, but the word “fast” does not translate to “hunger strike.” Sometimes, Christians do indeed fast completely – without food – for a brief period of time, like 24 hours, as an act of humility in seeking a deeper relationship with God. More often, fast means giving up something like a food item – let’s say our addiction to diet coke for example – for a longer period of time. Again, it’s the idea of humility and sacrifice.
So, with apologies to the left, we aren’t planning a hunger strike or mass suicide. Try to have a nice weekend anyway.